Directed by: Michael Bay
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Eiza González
Running Time: 136'
Verdict: ⊗
This is a shit movie. Bank heist goes wrong and now a war veteran and his criminal brother are in a getaway with a paramedic and an injured cop as hostages, in an ambulance. The premise is fucking amazing, yet this stupid, stupid movie manages to use none of it and just waste over two hours on a way over cut, way too prolonged, dumbest possible car chase. If this is director Michael Bay's attempt at Speed, it fails miserably. Oh, and you can't miss that this is Michael Bay, oh no. He is worried people will forget what movies he directed, so he sloppily throws in references to bunch of them. There are more car flips and arc shots than there are cars or character arcs. There are also some impressive crane shots, but then they are so overused that they become tedious. The bank heist is the most interesting part of the movie, but then most of it is just skipped for whatever reason. Acting is weak at best, and that's only from the three leads. Movie is constantly introducing new, unimportant characters, none of them with any personality outside their single task for the entire film. We are given plenty of stupid reasons to like the characters but all of them are just unlikable. There is barely any reasonable justification for any of characters' actions in the movie. Most (attempts at) comedy comes from Gyllenhaal's character, which is setup way too hard trying not to be the main villain, despite his very villainous actions for almost the whole movie. There is just too much forced drama, awkwardly splurged with weak humor. The pacing of the movie is ridiculous, with strange cuts and skipping between scenes, trying to be funny or atmospheric in the weirdest moments, and with innumerable continuity errors in the action scenes. This stupid, stupid auto fellatio of a movie offers no reason to enjoy it, especially for over two hours.
Rokin
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